Friends, today's Cao segment has arrived — and the irony levels are cranked to maximum.

Meta is testing an AI bedtime story app. Note: this isn't helping you write stories. This is generating bedtime stories directly for you to tell your kid.

TechCrunch's headline for this story is, without exaggeration, the best tech headline of 2026: "Meta is testing an AI bedtime story app for people with no imagination."

No euphemisms, no hedging, just straight-up savagery.

From "Helping You Work" to "Helping You Live"

AI has reached the point where we're used to it writing our emails, making our slides, coding our software, generating our images. Truth be told, a lot of people didn't enjoy doing those things anyway, so outsourcing to AI was whatever.

But bedtime stories?

Friends. The point of making up bedtime stories for your kid was never about how good the story is. Your made-up stories might have plot holes, continuity errors, you might forget the protagonist's name halfway through — and so what? That's your voice, your weird brain, the unique memory between you and your child.

Your kid might not remember a single specific story you told, but they'll remember "Dad always cracked himself up telling stories," "Mom's princesses always ended up becoming astronauts," "Dad's superheroes could only beat the monster after eating broccoli."

Those messy, imperfect, deeply personal moments are the entire point of parenting.

What Exactly Is AI Saving Us From?

Some might say: "I'm exhausted after work, I genuinely don't have the energy to make up stories, what's wrong with a little AI help?"

Fair. Workers are tired. But here's the thing: if you're so drained that you can't spare 10 minutes to ramble through a made-up story with your kid, you probably don't need an AI storyteller — you need to work less.

And once you open this door, where does it end? AI tells your kid bedtime stories, AI writes birthday messages to your friends, AI says goodnight to your partner, AI chats with your family at reunions — when every act requiring emotion and imagination is outsourced to AI, what's left of you as a distinct person?

One line from the TechCrunch piece is particularly brutal: "At last, a tech company has found a way to outsource humanity's oldest pastime: using our imaginations."

Let that one marinate.

For What It's Worth

Snark aside, this app will probably get plenty of downloads. "I'm so tired" is the defining condition of our era.

But let me leave you with a few practical reminders:

First, if you're genuinely too exhausted to tell your kid a silly story, look at adjusting your work schedule before buying an AI substitute. Parenting time isn't a task to optimize — it's a relationship.

Second, beware of tech products claiming to "save you time for family" — they're usually the things taking your family time in the first place, then selling you a counterfeit "replacement connection."

Third, imagination is a muscle. If you don't use it, it atrophies. Today making up stories feels hard; tomorrow making conversation feels hard; the day after, thinking for yourself feels hard.

That's it for today's Cao. See you tomorrow.